If you have ever seen Sesame Street you probably remember the segment called One Of These Things Doesn’t Belong Here? Recently, to my private pain I could hear that classic jingle bouncing around in my brain!
It has defiantly been a challenge to stay active with this winter being the worst in 5 years! You see, you can’t run and you cant ride your bike in the ice and snow. The result??? I’m putting on my winter poundage hibernation coat. Urrrghh! So, I decided to attack the winter blue cheese buffalo wings butt and signed up for an indoor triathlon at the local YMCA.
Enter Jason-
A friend of mine who happens to be a hardcore Iron Man. Jason invited me to train and ride bikes with him at a class he takes in Saratoga. I never heard of such a thing but I went for it and experienced a whole new world.
A whole new world of extremely skinny people in spandex! A whole new world of people flying their seasoned marathon outfits as badges of honor. A whole new world of the most expensive bicycles I have ever seen….in the thousands! Really I’m not kidding. A whole new world of really cool Lance Armstrong look alike people!
-Enter me.
The largest human they have ever seen in their class! They kept starring at me…and starring. I could hear them thinking…. shouldn’t he be training for football or be in an old school professional wrestler class? My outfit? I was proudly rocking my hoody and my super elastic waist band shorts! Their just lucky I wasn’t wearing spandex. My bike? Pee Wee Herman special baby! While everybody else was in race horizontal bike handle mode….I’m in vertical senior citizen position bike mode. Then to my horror the instructor says now its time to climb the mountain.
Climb the mountain?
Apparently my bike is not designed to climb mountains with a person that exceeds its weight limit. Climb the mountain position means you lift your blue cheese buffalo wing butt off the seat and drive the pedals as fast as you can while standing up. When I tried to climb the mountain I fell off the mountain! Now they are really starring.
One of the things just doesn’t belong here.







